Shame on me!

Meet Horatio Fogblower, another unfinished prop.  I shamefully left him out in the weather and he looks horrid, in the good and not so good way.   In the good way because he's kind of creepy; in the not-so-good way in that in the shape as he is now, he looks like crap.  The prop is a tombstone with his head protruding and fog billows out his mouth.  

A front view.  A sad front view.  The nose has broken off, the Model Magic has holes in it and the eyes are faded.  There's dirt and mold on him and the whole thing looks a shambles. 

Here we go, looks like the plastic surgery is going to be a smashing success!  Used a commercial papier mache' product to fill in the gaps and reconstruct the broken features. 

New teeth, filling in the skin gaps and a rhinoplasty.

He's going to make it through after all!  I owe it to him.  More to come!

Happy Birthday To ME!

I'm 48 today!  Just always remember as you get older and see bright and promising youths with hope and wonder in their eyes and a shining light in their soul:

Age and treachery will always overcome youth and skill!

Noteworthy Blog...She Didn't Float

No words, just pictures.  But if a picture paints a thousand words, I've read the Library of Congress.

Enter She Didn't Float, a blog of old, odd and vintage pictures.  Some disturbing, some thought provoking, some macabre, some darkly beautiful.  Go have a look-see, you'll be glad you did.

Some samples, for your enjoyment...

For my dear friend Mel who has a crush on Bob. 

Now THIS is a vampire, or vampyre rather!

I so have a crush on her!

Close Encounters of the Crawly Kind

Yesterday I felt something hit my back and when I finally stopped screaming and dancing around, this little (or rather big since he was about 2 1/2 inches) fellow was staring at me. The marks kind of look like a ghost's eyes. Anybody know what he is, besides a big ol' bug?

Happy Mother's Day!

Show your mother how much you love and care about her today!  Or else.

Who IS this person?! Holmes' Haunted Homes

This blew me away...



Seems that there's a haunter near Niagara region of Canada (there's a bunch of great haunters in Canada!) that knows his stuff!  All I can say is wow (and he must have blisters on his bottom from sitting in front of the computer programming this show!).

 Click here to go to the website (well worth it!).

DO WANT!!! And a must-see movie.

First of all, this clock is da bomb baby!



Second of all, this vampyre don't sparkle...I remember seeing this movie way back when and it's absolutely fantastic.  Klaus Kinski is creepy enough as it is but with the makeup, truly terrifying!



Another disturbing scene...I would have had to change my tighty whities.



The film I saw was in German with English subtitles, didn't take away from it in any shape, form or fashion.  SEE THIS FILM!

And So It Begins

 After work and a trip to the chiropractor (nothing like hearing your spinal column sound like someone stomping on bubble wrap), I decided that it was time to go to the shed and do some work.  It took me about 2 days to fully clean it up and out but I am now officially removed from the Hoarders television show lineup for filming.

Meet Baron Von Boris, my Disneyesque Haunted Mansion graveyard projection statue.  I jumped on him today and made a lot of progress with him.  A little more smoothing of the edges and about 200 coats of white paint and he will be ready.  His movements are going to be subtle, mostly eyes closed with the occasional wink, smirk, looking around and rude tongue sticking out for comedic relief.   I worked on his facial features until I was about to go crazy and then I glanced over to a shelf....an unused mardi gras mask kit I bought on a lark.  Some old fabric and my Martha Stewart limited edition XL9000 Twin Turbo glue gun (with optional magazine clip for extra glue sticks) and he had a shirt front, collar and smart looking bow tie. I think that it will look a lot like stone when it's all painted.

Aside from that, I'm building a horse-drawn hearse.  I've always wanted one, they are uber cool.  My neighbors will now KNOW I'm a psycho if there was any doubt in their mind by now.

I'm really looking forward to working on Hallowe'en this year.  Just for the little time I spent in the shed today gave me a feeling of accomplishment.  I've decided to retire a lot of the older props and start anew with some fresh ideas.  I was thinking about things like theme, continuity, story line but I'm leaning towards anything goes this year (within the graveyard context).

More to come.....

BioWeapon Man!

I've been sick for about 7 days now with something that proves the existence of an intelligent and conscious evil bent on making lives for humans unbearable:  Adult onset hand-foot-mouth disease.  It's rampant here I've found out and what makes it particularly nasty is that you can't eat solid food.  Jello is a solid food in this case (although Jello is the other case for a conscious and intelligent evil) and leaves your mouth with raw bleeding blisters that feels like you've brushed your teeth with Captain Crunch (I love Captain Crunch but when I'm finished, it feels like my mouth has been sandpapered and ready for a coat of varnish).
So loaded with a supply of antibiotics and antivirals that would make the Center for Disease Control proud, just one thing is wrong...they don't work on this.  Can you say pissy mood?  Even the Lortabs don't help (but it is kind of fun staring at the wall while I'm on them). Today's the 7th day and hopefully it will have run it's course, and I can stop having Carnation Instant Breakfast, Carnation Instant Lunch and Carnation Instant Dinner.  Oh, and Carnation Instant Snacks.
I did have a little fun, I had to go to the bank and grocery store for more Carnation Instant Life Support and with a big bleeding gums smile on my face, I found everyone was soooo nice and polite and just gave me all the room that I needed.  How sweet of them!
Eh, I try to look at the bright side of things, I've lost 8 pounds so far.

Not So Sure....

I admit it, I'm a vampire aficionado.  And a Depp aficionado.  And a Burton aficionado.  And the word aficionado aficionado.  But this...I'm trying not to pass judgement as yet.  I was very excited for the first 30 seconds of the trailer but when Barnabas is brushing his fangs, that more or less lost it for me.  A comedy?!  They have made my beloved Dark Shadows in which I would peek over the sofa to watch because I was too scared to sit in front of the TV to watch into a comedy?  I will definitely go see it but will NOT be happy if it turns out to be a bunch of cheap jokes.  Oh well, I need to be rich so I can remake it myself and do it right.

Yesterday my body crashed.  I started feeling cruddy around 2 and started running a fever.  Joint pain, chills, muscle aches, headache, I thought I had the flu.  Still went to get my hair cut but felt like crap.  Went to bed at 6 and got a call-in for Tamiflu.  Tamiflu didn't touch it.  For 75.00 it should have at least made me high or something as a consolation prize!  Went to the doc in the box today and she found the trouble...massive sinus infection.  Thank goodness, I didn't have the....wait a minute, I still feel like crap and spent 75.00 on medicine that I didn't need.   After 70.00 more in copays and more drugs, I'm feeling better, except my rump.  The nurse gave me 2 shots, a steroid and a high powered antibiotic.  Why did she have to say "This one is going to sting, it's really thick".   I have a high pain threshold but dannnnng, I was easing into the car seat very slowly.

Going to the doctor, I saw the coolest thing I have seen in a while and I have a purpose now.  A bald headed bearded guy with lots of tats was driving an old beat up black Lincoln hearse with racing flames on it.  Oh yes, I will find this guy and this wonderful vehicle and have my picture taken with it.   I didn't know that there was anyone THAT cool in this town (besides me, of course).

Redneck hearse....cool, I could be taken to the cemetery in that just fine!

Nice but still, I like the tractor tires hearse.

YESSSSSSSSSSS!!!!

Hold on, I can only go once, I love this Bram Stoker's Dracula hearse too!  No fair!

NO NO NO ABSOLUTELY NOT!!!  I REFUSE TO BE CARRIED IN A SOCCER MOM HEARSE!

Pumpkin on a Stick Info....

I've had several people ask about Pumpkin on a Stick information...I remember getting my seeds from Amazon.com from Hirts Garden but they are currently sold out.  HOWEVER, several other vendors have these seeds from Amazon as well as Abundant Life Seeds or Rare and Exotic Seeds.  A quick Googling for Pumpkin on a Stick seeds should come up with several vendors.

Hope this helps!

Finally...Something to Say.

Sorry folks, haven't been around a bit, mainly because I have had nothing to say, at least in the Hallowe'en sense.  Seems that housework, work, overall just having a late winter malaise has dried up my creative juices but yesterday I got a jumpstart.
For those who may remember this post on the Hallowe'en Tree from Gurney's nursery, I may have forgotten to mention last year that my two Katsura trees came in (one died but a quick call and they replaced it free of charge), the one that lived put on leaves and in the fall, as promised, released a smell akin to cotton candy, caramel and ginger just as promised.  It was better than expected (I actually didn't expect any smell at all).  So yesterday I got 2 more Katsura trees and a sugar maple.

katsura tree-cercidiphyllum-japonicum

Sugar Maple

I dig maples.  I love their blazing fall colors, their shape and their connotations of Hallowe'en and fall. I also love maple syrup but I'm not going to be driving any spigots into the trunk any time soon.

Also, as if that wasn't enough, I got a book from Amazon in the mail too (loves to see me a pasteboard box with a smiley face on it on the doorstep)...

Book Three Babaaayyyy!!!!

I didn't know that the Mitchells had released volume three, I came up on it by accident.  Folks, this set of books is a no-brainer, beg/steal/borrow the money type of investment.  They are WELL worth the price tag (keep in mind that they are in full color, idea-packed and beautifully photographed).  Lots of great ideas and inspiration in each and every volume.

And if that wasn't enuf...

I won a complete set of Hauntforum DVD haunts from Hauntcast!  How did I win (besides drawing a circle in monkey blood on the floor by the light of a full moon while chanting a spell naked with the blinds open, or was that too much information?), I went to PayPal through the Hauntcast site and became a yearly subscriber and hopefully might win another of the kick@$$ prizes that are offered.  So get your rear in gear and go sign up for Hauntcast!  Even if I didn't win or didn't have a chance to win anything, I would subscribe for the information that they provide and if nothing else, to support the haunt community.  Com'on folks, it's getting close to March 8, the deadline where they HAVE to have 250 subscribers or the deal's off.   Do your part, and PayPal is STILL offering no interest payments for 6 months so you don't have to fork over the $100.00 all at once, you can pay a little at a time; it's what I did and it doesn't hurt that way.

The good part of blogging and following blogs is that you can get information you didn't know was even out there.  A bit ago, I ran across someone who blogged about Hallowe'en plants, namely Pumpkin on a Stick.

What is there NOT to love about this?!  Ok, lets get this out of the way...1...2...3...awwww they're so cuuuutttte!  A member of the eggplant family (of all things) this cutie can be cut and dried for autumn/Hallowe'en arrangements.  So, I buys me some seeds (found some organic ones, not that it would matter to me if they were organic or infected with pathogens or nuclear waste, just so long as they grow) and used these cool seed starting trays from Burpees which doesn't allow me to to the unforgivable seed sin....overwatering (bought the trays at Lowe's but have seen them at Kmart and everywhere else).

My pumpkins on a stick babies!

Against all advice, I also started Chinese Lanterns

I have heard that they are prolific, invasive and can be a noxious weed.  Don't care, they're pretty, that's all what counts to me, although I will probably be cussing at them if half of what I have heard about them is true.  But what would there be not to love about a flowerbed full of invasive little orange lanterns?

My little Chinese Lantern seeds waking up...

Lastly, there needs to be a new show of the Discovery Health Channel...Hallowe'en Hoarders.  I looked through my shop and realized that I am a hoarder.

 I NEED everything in there.  Yes, there's just a tiny walking path through it but everything in there is valuable.  I NEED it!  I'm expecting my family to be seated in the living room one day and I walk in for an unexpected intervention.

"Joe, we need to talk with you because we love you."

"What is this? What's going on?!"

"Joe, we think that you have a problem with your Halloween obsession.  We think that you might need a little bit of help"

"Nothing's wrong with me, I don't have the problem, you all do. You've been against Halloween from the beginning!"

"Now Joe, please calm down, we are only concerned for you. We think that you just need a little rest from your hobby, that's all."

"Rest?!  I'm behind already!  I have several new props in mind that I haven't even started on! Nothing is wrong with me, everyone just doesn't understand!"

"We do understand and we know that you just need a little rest.  You look chilled, let these nice two men help you put on this nice jacket."

"I'm not cold and you are...wait, why aren't there any holes at the end of the sleeves?!  I'm not crazy, you are, the whole world is mad I tell you!  I've got corpses to build and coffins to construct!  Let me go I tell you!  I'm not mad, I'm the only sane one around!"

"Take good care of him, he's really a nice man deep down"

"I WILL KILL YOU ALL AND PUT YOU IN THE YARD HAUNT!!!  YOU'RE CHEAPER THAN A BUCKY TO ME!!!  I AM GOING TO HAVE THE BEST YARD HAUNT BECAUSE OF THE REALISM, BECAUSE I'LL HAVE REAL CORPSES!!! IT WILL BE GREAT, JUST YOU WAIT AND SEE!!!  OH WAIT, YOU WON'T BE ABLE TO SEE IT, YOU'LL ALL BE IN IT!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

"On second thought, keep him as long as you can, we could use the rest."

Hauntcast and Paypal...

I was really considering NOT resubscribing to Hauntcast because of the price tag.  I simply couldn't afford dropping 100.00 at one shot.  I have NO problems with paying for the content, the people that make up the program NEED to be compensated; it takes moolah and time (more time I would guess and time is money so I guess even more moolah) to put on a program.  Heck, I have trouble finding things to write about a lot of times (as evidenced by my absence, I promise I'm going to start blogging again very soon, life happens).

But back to the point...I couldn't drop 100.00 all at once but if you sign up with Paypal for the 6 months no interest option, you can pay 20.00 a month and pay it off easily.  20.00 a month isn't bad, so I encourage you to consider subscribing to Hauntcast if nothing else for the long list of discounts that will come in handy!

See y'all soon...

Blarg!!!

I'll take tooth decay, gingivitis, halitosis, and tartar build up so heavy it crunches when I move my mouth over brushing with this!!!

Just...kill...me...

I am unable to live in a world where this exists.

This is a sad, sad day for humanity.

WTF?!

Pardon me, but what is this and why do we need a Twilight blow dryer? Does it come with glitter cartridges, sold separately? Does it give you a pasty complexion or that flat emotionless look that Bella sports?

Someone help me out on this, I'm confused.

Random Ramblings and S & M kitteh spanking.

Now THAT got your attention, didn't it?



I have 3 other cats that love kitteh spanking, I'll try to get Albert to do his spanking dance on film (or digital rather).  He usually turn around afterwards and either does the amorous rolling or the I love you like a goat head butt.

Went to the hospital sleep clinic last night for a checkup.  First of all this is what is waiting on you on the bed as you walk into the 2500.00 a night room...

After you have about 30 electrodes stuck all over you, 2 monitoring belts, an oxygen finger device with a red light on it and a cpap mask on, they cheerfully say, "just sleep normally"...

Uh huh, like that was going to happen.  I actually slept some and was relieved when 5:45am came and I could get unhooked and go home.  This is what I looked like right after she unsnapped all the wires...

I must really love you people for letting you see me like this.

So all in all, everything if fine.  Everything was fine before but they saw that I hadn't used up all my allotment for my insurance this year and thought that needed remedied.

So go ahead and hate me, I'm going to Vegas next week.  Free flight for 2 (yes it's on South{cattle car}West but hey, I can moo for 4 hours there). Free hotel.  Mrs. Macabre is the Jedi Master of discounts and free stuff.  If you go to Southwest.com (yes, the airline), they have a credit card offer for 50,000 travel points through Chase bank if you apply and use it once.  It might say 25,000 points but if you Google around, you can probably find the 50,000 points offer like we did the other night.  I saw a program about a guy that is the king of free travel and this is his website.  I used to feel somewhat bad for taking advantage of freebies and such because I felt like I was taking advantage of the company.  I have since moved on from that way of thinking and now if I can $(&#W a credit card company out of some freebies, you better dang well believe I will.  And if you stay off season, most of the time the hotels will comp you your room and give you gambling credit to boot.  They want you to stay, enjoy yourself and gamble away the credit they give you and then some.  Luckily, I'm a cheap @$$ when it comes to gambling...and unlucky so I give the credits to Mrs. M and usually we come out to the positive (Mrs. M can gamble and make money, however).  The freebies are out there people, go get them!

Ahem.

Groan, going to the %$#@^&* mall this afternoon.  I HATE crowds, I HATE our mall and I especially HATE our crowded Christmas rabies infested crowds mall!  But a guy's gotta do what a guy's gotta do, put on hockey pads and tackle the opposition for the bargains!  

Will be back a bit later...

Animal Abuse

All together now, awwwwww how cuuuuuttttte!

This gets them back for peeing on the mattress.

I love being mean and evil >:•D